As far as anything outside of sex, top and bottom have no real meaning to a gay relationship and are absolutely not analogous to traditional male or female roles in a heterosexual relationship. There is no woman in a gay relationship, just two men.
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Sometimes gay men in relationships must manage anyone who is The Other who undermines their relationship: an intrusive inlaw, noisy neighbors, flirtatious twinks in clubsbarssocial events
Even though 92 of gay men are bottoms, according to my ethnographic field research, lots of gay men are ashamed of it, as if theres something less masculine about it. The majority of mainstream gay dudes are all about masculinity, and anything that eclipses that has got to go.